Our thoughts on pronouns and why are they important

Most of us are told from the day we are born what gender we are. For many people, our parents are told what our sex is before we are even born. But is there a difference between sex and gender? Yes! Generally speaking, sex refers to a persons physical characteristics at birth and gender refers to how a person identifies. We often think of gender as being two things, male and female, however, gender is a broad spectrum.

You have likely heard many of the following before… Pink is for a girl, blue is for a boy, girls are the carers, boys are the providers, girls wear pretty skirts and dresses, boys fight and get dirty in the mud. It has taken a long time for women to have the right to vote, to work, to wear trousers but yet it is still considered abnormal for a man to wear ‘feminine clothing’ or it is often seen as funny. There is a long way to go before everyone is free to be themselves and have equality.

A lot of people are comfortable with their sex and their gender and the two things often align but for some of us, we do not subscribe to these made up gender constructs. Some people do not identify with one fixed gender, some may feel comfortable embracing both male and female, some may not identify with gender at all and some may even go back and forth between genders. Gender is not always binary.

There are many people who push back on this and do not understand, but pronouns matter. You might have heard comments such as ‘It’s obvious I am a man’, ‘This is getting too political’ or ‘My pronouns are King, Queen’. This isn’t something to joke about nor is it a political statement. It can be offensive to make assumptions or deny someone of their identity. Using someone’s correct pronouns is a simple way to show respect and care. There are many people who do not understand the importance of using the correct pronoun but would be upset if someone continuously used the wrong one that they identify with such as calling a man she when he prefers to be called he.